"No one else is responsible for your misery - it is just you who have forgotten how vast and beautiful you are." ~Sri Sri
Bad things happen to everyone in this world. Good things happen too. They are just events. As they actually happen, they are temporary and momentary. How we string these events together into an Identity-card is up to us, and completely at our discretion.
Some people carry the victim card all life long, because some bad things happened to them in the past. Some people have endured horrible events yet don't identify themselves as victims at all: they become active, creative, and inspiring to others. They are not defined by their past.
And then there are those who have lived quite privileged lives, yet focus constantly on their problems, imagining themselves to be victims of a terrible fate.
What happens to us is not always in our control. But the identity we construct for ourselves is what really determines our "fate," and it is completely of our choosing.
I know a heroic man who is a Muslim American. As a soldier in the U.S. military he was wounded and his wounds permanently disabled him. He is bound to live in a wheel chair for the rest of his life. Since he has become a peace-activist, and is a Muslim, our government has been trying to expel him from this country. He has every reason to be bitter and feel victimized. Yet he is a bright light of inspiration, a tireless peace-maker, an energizer of hope.
We choose our fate, and we choose it constantly, Now.